This weekend seems like the right time for one of those America-is-awesome columns, you know, before you go out and wave those American flags made in another country. It feels like a patriotic duty.

So, in honor of America’s 232nd birthday, I’m going to list 232 reasons to love sports in America right now.

OK, not really. I’m going to list 11, a completely arbitrary number.

Before I start, one suggested change: Can we get rid of the wave in baseball and bring back the bullpen cart? Is that too much to ask? Somewhere, Bob Wickman is nodding.

Not all of these are exclusive to American sports. I’m not trying to be misanthropic toward other countries here. OK, to the positive stuff:

1. Video montages before college football games: I like all of them. Even Vanderbilt has finally accumulated enough highlights over the last 75 years to make one. I love how those videos always trigger a roar from the crowd that reaches a crescendo when the team emerges from the tunnel. That’s a great moment.

I’m not even sure what Bear Bryant is saying during Alabama’s pregame video. It sounds like a bunch of mumbling to me. I like to pretend he’s saying, “Anyone who stands and cheers after I speak is a complete moron.” Weirdly, Alabama’s montage is probably my favorite. It’s very well done.

2. Standing and clapping with two strikes: It’s the first step to making the atmosphere at baseball games resemble college football games. Anyone who’s been to Wrigley Field or Fenway Park knows what I’m talking about. I love it. Unfortunately, you will not see this in Atlanta before the ninth inning. I saw an oblivious fan at Turner Field stand and clap with two strikes, and the guy behind him thought that meant the Tool Race was about to begin.

3. Football in HD: I don’t know if it’s the contrast between the green grass and the white lines or what, but it’s fantastic. The Green Bay-Seattle snow game in the playoffs almost put me in a trance.

4. Our quirky love for mascots: I read where some people questioned why fans displayed so much emotion over Uga VI’s death. It’s an easy explanation: People have attachments to their school and emotions and the need, as human beings, to express themselves. It’s pretty cool.

5. The inexplicable dichotomy between Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter: It makes me giddy to watch Yankees fans come to the slow realization that Rodriguez is 10 times more valuable than Jeter. One unselfishly moved from shortstop to third base. One owns an OPS of .995 and one has an OBP of .279 (!) this year.

6. Tecmo Bo: America boasted a football player so amazing, so powerful, that his video game character generates more conversation than some real athletes. Bo Jackson says some people approach him just to talk about his Tecmo Bowl character. Tecmo Bo deserves his own spot in the Hall of Fame.

7. The Tampa Bay Rays: They’re not just the underdogs, they’re a bunch of kids. The oldest starting pitcher is 26. They’re the easiest baseball team to root for since the Cleveland Indians in “Major League.”

8. The suits on NBA draft night: Who is dressing these players? Or, more specifically: Which restaurant is providing the waiters to dress these players?

9. YouTube college sports moments set to cool music: Imagine trying explain the benefit of YouTube to someone 10 years ago. YouTube has been unbelievable for sports. Highlights, interviews, montages — it’s all there. There’s one of Boise State beating Oklahoma that’s an absolute tear-jerker.

10. Over-the-top fantasy baseball leagues: In the Times Free Press Sports fantasy baseball league, statistics are counted with an abacus and sent to owners via mail every month. I’m barely kidding. But for 99 percent of other leagues, the line between fantasy and reality is blurred by rookie drafts and minor league rosters. I have a league where I can groom minor leaguers who will be on my team for the next 15 years. It’s like being a real baseball GM, only the players are more loyal.

11. The day when the guy waving behind the home-plate screen on his cell phone watches helplessly as someone rips the phone out of his hands and hurls it five sections over: Please, please let this happen.

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